Expectations Versus Reality: Why Dating Is Hard

Expectations Versus Reality Why Dating Is Hard

There’s the “Hollywood” romance and then there’s yours. Why the reality of dating is NOTHING close to what you expect it to be like.

Expectation: You Should Look For An Epic Love Story

Sleepless in Seattle, Pretty Woman, Dirty Dancing, You Got Mail, etc. You get the point, the more drama, the better the ending, the better chance you have at an happily ever after love story

Reality: You Build Something Together

You do not need pain in order to have passion. The best love stories that happen, happen unexpectedly and happen because two people decide to build something together.

Expectation: You Need A Relationship To Be Happy

You don’t need to be in a relationship in order to be happy. People assume that in order to be happy, you need to be with someone, hence why online dating is at an all-time high. Don’t settle for love. Period. If you are expecting someone to make you happy, you are mislead. The only person who can make you happy is yourself.

Reality: Happiness Isn’t a Relationship It’s Who You Are

If you aren’t happy alone and with yourself, you can never find happiness with anyone.

Expectation: You and I become “we”

When one of you is invited somewhere, you both go; one of you doesn’t exist without another. When you are in a relationship, the independence dies, because now it’s all about “we” everywhere.

Reality: It Takes Two

If you become a “we” and stop maintaining two distinct lives and identities, the relationship risks collapsing in on itself.

Expectation: Things Will Never Go Wrong

We’ll never argue. We’ll never have to worry about outside pressures. We’ll never have family problems. Everything will always come up roses.

Reality: Things Will Go Wrong

Relationships are not always smooth sailing. Issues come up, disagreements happen. It’s the way you handle the trough times together that defines your relationship.

Expectations: You Change For Someone You Love

If your relationship is struggling, you will change in order to adapt to the person you’re with and improve to be good enough. Hey, maybe you’ll even change what you want out of life so you can accommodate your partner’s goals and desire. It’s all about your partner now, not you.

Reality: A Relationship Is A Two-Way Street

You should not have to change who you are in order to be with someone you love. Sometimes, compromise is necessary, but changing who you are and compromising are not the same thing.

Expectation: Your Relationship Is Everything

Now that you are in a relationship, that’s it. You are done. Every focus should be on this relationship and you must be with your best friend.

Reailty: A Realtionship Adds To Your Life

A relationship adds to your life, doesn’t take anything away and it’s the only thing that matters in your life. Yes, you have your career, you may have kids, you have hobbies, interests, etc. Having that special someone in life will add to what you already have. other information can be found on Neotangkas

Expectation: Your Love Is The Be-all, End-all

How many times have you heard the saying, “Love conquers all?” and, “All you need is love?” This is what will help you get through all the tough times, is love and only love.

Reality: Love Is Only The Foundation

Relationships require a hell of a lot more than love. They require trust, effort, understanding, faith, patience and honesty. Those are the things that will get you through the tough patches, not just love alone.

Expectations vs Realities

All relationships go through bad times, but real relationships get through bad times. Relationships include: fights, jealousy, arguments, and tears. But a real relationship fights through all of those with real, genuine, love. Expecting things to turn out a certain way will end up disappointing you.

15 Questions You Wish You Could Ask Your New Ex

15 Questions You Wish You Could Ask Your New Ex

It ended for some reason, but you’re left with a ton of unanswered questions

  1. “So how’s that job hunt working out for you?

You never paid a dime for gas, groceries, entertainment, dinners, vacations, or literally anything for the better part of a year. You didn’t just break up with me, you broke up with my credit card too.

  1. “You didn’t seriously think I was stupid enough to never find out, did you?”

“He’s my friend” and “He’s like a brother to me” are red flags one and two that you’re polishing his knob on the regular. How stupid did you think I am?

  1. “What’s the Over/Under on how many of them you faked?”

Five out of seven, maybe? Six of ten? Ballpark it for me, just so I can adjust for the future.

  1. “Did you get the bill I sent you for the windshield?”

If you could be a dear and go ahead and get that check to me, that’d be awesome. Or at least let me know where to send the summons. Thanks.

  1. “Your friend Dawn? Do you still have her number handy?”

I wanted to umm… ask her something? I think she left something at my place after that one dinner party we had. She’s still single, no? Just wondering.

  1. “Do you have any idea how bad of a cook you are?”

Seriously, you served me spaghetti tacos. With a dead serious face. You’re the reason I learned how to cook.

Which will actually now get me laid a ton. So… thanks?

  1. “Which thrift shop did you drop my Yankees jersey off with?”

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got your selfie. Yes, I’m aware you snagged it. Just let me know where it is and I’ll go get it. Very mature.

  1. “Why do you keep telling me about this new guy as if I care?”

You’re his problem now. If that’s a life choice he’s comfortable making, far be it from me to stand in his way. In all honesty, I should thank him for taking that bullet for guys everywhere.

  1. “Your parents never liked me, did they?”

It’s cool, we’re all adults here. I thought they’re both idiots. So there’s that.

  1. “You didn’t really hit a deer in my car, did you?”

Fess up. You hit a light pole and let me file a false claim with the insurance. Come on, be honest… you tried to parallel park while texting, didn’t you?

  1. “That trip to Key West we planned? You don’t mind if I take your friend Kelli in your place, do you?”

The ticket and hotel is already paid for. Shame to see it go to waste. Plus, she already got the time off from work. Not like you paid for literally any part of it.

  1. “That Tag Heuer you got me last birthday… it’s fake, right?”

I’m pretty sure that suit coat wasn’t actually Ralph Lauren too. It’s fine, those earrings aren’t diamonds.

  1. “If you thought ‘Avengers’ was stupid, why’d you go with me to see it?”

I seriously told four different friends I couldn’t make it just so I could take you. That’s one more evening you could have had your side guy come over like we both know you would have.

  1. “You’re still cool with your brother and I playing golf, right?”

I don’t care, he doesn’t care, and we just wanted to know if you’re able to get over yourself and be a grown up about it.

  1. “So you, uhhh… got your, umm… you know…Right?”

Just really not trying to get that phone call in a month or two.

To get the attention of a lover, use a car offered by Honda Makassar.

Foolproof Relationship Tips For Men

Foolproof Relationship Tips For Men

Ever since a man was a boy, he has been competitive. He competes for grades, competes for friends, competes to be on the varsity team and he competes for THAT girl. If you are a man and having trouble landing THAT girl, your problem stems from looking at it as a competition. Here are foolproof ways to get her; and to keep her.

Don’t Be Afraid To Flirt

You are at a bar and this woman catches your eye. Don’t talk yourself out of approaching her and actually flirting by saying hi. Instead what do you guys do? You throw a pick-up line her way and watch her walk away! Flirt but don’t be a douche.

Surprise Her Often

After you flirt with her and get her number, it’s important to woo her. Wooing her is the step you need to take in order to “land” her.

Read Up

What is meant by “read up” is quite simple: read up on things that interest the woman you are trying to woo. The more you know about her and her interests, the better you will look.

Give Her Your Attention

Instead of focusing on the game, the guys, and your smartphone, take time to focus on her and her alone.

Indulge In Romantic Gestures

Frequently, set time aside to indulge her in romance. Go on a romantic trip, set up a picnic in the park, etc. So something that will in turn, make her smile.

Include Her In Your Decisions

Whatever decision you need to make, ask her for your opinion. Let her know that her thoughts and feelings matter.

Respect Her

Displaying a chivalrous attitude is the perfect way to show your respect for the women in your life.

Be A Sex God

A successful Relationship has two important traits, beautiful romance and sizzling sexual chemistry.

Be Honest

One of the worse things ANY man can do is to string a woman long and then go, “I just don’t want to mislead you.” Sorry buddy, but you already have! Let a woman know what your intentions are. If things are moving too fast, tell her to slow down. Don’t be shaky when it comes to being open and honest.


Always keep the lines of communication open 24/7 With technology today this is very simple.

Show Your Appreciation

Nothing pisses off a woman more than being taken for granted. Always show her that you care, that you acknowledge all that she does for you and always reciprocate your affection.

Don’t Cheat Or Lie

It doesn’t matter if you are married or in a relationship. There is NO excuse for cheating or lying. That’s what breaking up and divorce is for! If you aren’t happy, leave. But don’t disrespect your woman by cheating and lying to her.

Break Up In Person

If you need to break up don’t be coward and do it over a text, over social media, a voice mail, or even in an email. A REAL man does it face to face.

Tell Her You Love Her

Always tell her that you are proud of her, that you love her and that you are always going to be there for her. Make he feel that you can’t live without her and she will take that to heart.

Don’t Let Her Get Away

One mistake most guys make is that they fear committing to a woman too fast. So you guys play games, beat around the bush, and in turn let her walk away. Then you get jealous when another man reaps the reward of your stupidity. As Beyonce sang, “If you liked it then you should’ve put a ring on it.”

15 Ways Not To Talk To A Woman

15 Ways Not To Talk To A Woman

There’s all kinds of ways men can be taught to talk to a woman. But have you ever been told what not to do? You’re probably making some of these mistakes when you hit up the bar, but I’m here to help!

  1. At her chest

Look, girls stare at each other’s chests too, we get it. You just have to try your hardest to get out of this habit because we always know.

  1. With cockiness

If you’re full of yourself, then we won’t be.

  1. Don’t insult them

When guys get nervous with flirting, sometimes they poke fun without even realizing it. She’ll realize it, and she’ll hate it.

  1. For too long

If you’re out in a social situation like a bar, don’t hog her time. Even if she’s interested in you, it also helps sometimes if you play hard to get. You also don’t want to make her feel like she needs to entertain you because you won’t leave her alone.

  1. With your boys

Don’t bring your team over to participate in conversation. If one of your drunk buddies comes over to meddle, kick him out.

  1. Too much eye contact

Take a break from staring, you’re making her uncomfortable.

  1. While messing with your phone

If you’re entertaining yourself with something else, so will she.

  1. With nothing but questions

Don’t interview this Woman. If you can’t make conversation, she’s already lost interest.

  1. With too much touching

Don’t keeping finding ways to touch her while you’re talking. You’re making her uncomfortable. One or two grazes is okay, but don’t rest your hand on her lower back during your first chat.

  1. With rank breath

Please keep that breath on check honey.

  1. Talking yourself up

If you can only talk about yourself, she might end up deflating your ego.

  1. With too many jokes

It stopped being funny after joke No. 1.

  1. Not facing her

If you’re body is not positioned toward this woman, she’s going to think you’re not interested. More often than not, the woman is reading your body language more than you think she is.

  1. While you’re smoking

Gross. Even if you both smoke, don’t lead with a cigarette.

  1. With touchy subjects

Leave religion, politics, and past relationships out of your conversations for a while.

Things Women Should Do Before Ending a Serious Relationship

Things Women Should Do Before Ending a Serious Relationship

Ending a serious relationship is a life-changing decision. Here are 15 things a woman should do before ending a serious relationship.

Think In Terms Of The Future

Before you break up a serious Relationship, ask yourself if you can see him with you as part of your future.

Ask Yourself These Important Questions:

1) Can the relationship be saved?

2) Am I jumping the gun?

3) Am I going through anything that is putting a strain on my relationship?

Don’t Deliver Your Message In Public

The last thing you want to do is cause a scene. Remember to break off the relationship in private.

Don’t Break His Heart At The Following Time:

Don’t break off the relationship before he needs to go to work, while he is at work, before Valentine’s Day, Christmas, or his birthday. Always pick the best time.

Stay Calm

Don’t get upset and say things you can’t take back. Remember, to stay calm.

A Face to Face Conversation Is Best

When you plan to end a serious relationship, the worst way to end it is by email, text, social media, etc. Prepare yourself to have a face to face conversation, no matter how uncomfortable you will feel.

Don’t Start Dating Someone Else

You are technically still in a relationship, so don’t start looking for someone new UNTIL you break things off first. You really shouldn’t date right away. Instead give yourself time to breathe.

Don’t Act Suspicious

The worse thing you can do is act like you are creeping on the side or something isn’t right, when you aren’t. If you are ending a relationship because you don’t feel the sparks, or because he has turned into someone you can’t be with, don’t let him think it’s because you found someone else.

Think It Over

Once you end it, you can’t go back and say you were kidding or that you change your mind. That’s a lot for any person to take. You need to take some alone time and think it over before it’s too late.


You don’t want to get emotional during your talk with your partner, so it’s best to let out all your emotions prior to the talk.

Talk It Over

Don’t keep this decision you are making to yourself. Talk to someone you can confide in before taking the plunge to end it.

Take A Kickboxing Class

Remember, a relationship is 50-50. If you are planning to end it, it’s not just his fault; it’s partly yours too. Before you talk to him about ending the relationship, take all the excess anger out first. You can do that by taking a kickboxing class.

Avoid Angry Discussions

Telling him that you plan to end the relationship, isn’t going to be easy. Especially if you are blindsiding him. The worse thing to do is to tell him it’s over while having an argument.

Stop Having Sex

The worse message you can send is by continuing to sleep with him if you are seriously thinking about breaking off a serious relationship.

Before You Split, Talk To The Kids

If you have kids together, make sure you sit down with them and discuss what is about to happen. You will need to explain things age appropriate.

Things People Do When They First Meet The Parents

Things People Do When They First Meet The Parents

Meeting your boyfriend or girlfriend’s parents for the first time is a big deal. Here are 15 things to avoid doing so you don’t mess up your first impression on them.

Trying To Over Impress Them

They’ll see right through your act and they won’t be impressed at all.


Belittling others in front of your partner’s parents will only make you look bad.

Being Obnoxiously Loud

They get it, you’re nervous, but that doesn’t mean you need to be ridiculously loud to cover your anxiety.

Overstaying Their Welcome

Pay attention to social cues to tell you when it’s appropriate to leave, or else the parents may get annoyed that they have to entertain you for hours past their bedtime.

Leaving Early

On the other hand, if you skip out too soon they may think you’re rude. If you’re paying attention, you’ll be able to tell when it’s the right time to make your departure since I’m sure you’ll be dying to leave after an hour or two.

Being Overly Affectionate

Their parents already know that you like their kid, so there’s no need to get all lovey-dovey in front of them.

Talking About Religion Or Politics

It’s best to avoid bringing up any controversial topics, and when someone starts talking about politics or religion, it’s sure to lead to an unwanted heated debate.

Dressing Inappropriately

Always dress to impress when meeting parents for the first time, or else they will think meeting them isn’t important to you.

Don’t Offer To Help Clean Up

Of course they’ll decline your offer, but it’s best to show your willing to help out. It’s rude to just sit back and wait for them to clear your dishes, or clean up messes.

Turning Into An Introvert

Some people get shy when meeting someone for the first time, but make sure it doesn’t happen when meeting your significant other’s parents. It’s always awkward for someone to be anti-social when they need to make a good first impression.

Playing On Their Phone

Playing on your phone when meeting people is basically saying you don’t care what they think of you, or that you’re making a bad impression. Not the ideal way to meet someone’s parents for the first time.

Talking About Exes

Their parents most likely don’t care why your ex broke up with you, and discussing it only makes thing tense and weird.

Bodily Noises

They’re gross and not the best first impression, so please, hold it in.


You may not even realize you’re doing it, but they do. It doesn’t make you look mature or cool, so try to hold your tongue when meeting the parents.

Calling Them ‘Mom’ Or ‘Dad’

They probably won’t be too comfortable with you calling them ‘mom’ and ‘dad’ the first time you meet them.

10 Reasons You Should Cheat on Him

Reasons You Should Cheat on Him

There are certain obvious signs it’s time to have a little fun on the side.

  1. The Candy That He Ate

He gave you candy without flowers on Valentine’s Day, and as soon as you opened the candy he ate all the chocolates except the coconut one which he knew you hated.

  1. The Nasty Girl Next Door

On his laptop he replaced the screensaver of you in your wedding dress with a bikini shot of the new aerobics instructor who just moved in next door.

  1. The Flat He Expects You to Change

Last week when you had a blowout on the Interstate and pulled over on the shoulder he said, “I’ll open the trunk for you so you can change the tire.”

  1. His Cheating Co-worker

In the middle of the night on Tuesday he screamed out in his sleep: “Sabrina, I told you we can’t do this at work. Let’s wait till my wife goes to her sales expo in Akron!”

  1. The Bottle You Tried to Hide

When you confiscated all the bottles of Jack Daniels you noticed a funny smell in the paper milk carton and after he ate his Corn Flakes he began clucking like a rooster.

  1. The Grass Spot His Bad Habit Made

You noticed a strange bare spot where grass didn’t grow behind the back patio, and so you started spying on him when he went out there and discovered he took a leak on that spot every night at 7:30.

  1. The Silly Game He’d Rather Play Than Satisfy You

When you told him you were in the mood two weeks ago he came to bed at 12:30 and played Candy Crush Saga on his phone till you were out cold.

  1. His Old Aunt Betty

He deleted all the text messages from females on his phone except the ones from his sister Ruthie and his Aunt Betty in Tacoma.

  1. What He Reminds You of In Bed

He snores like a hog and claims you do.

  1. A New Partner

Because the most gorgeous guy you ever saw in your life just asked you to go to Maui with him for a week.